Friday, December 16, 2016

life after 18 - the present

I can't say I am over the hurt of my mom passing away.
I feel it harder some days more than others.
It's getting easier, but I still remember her. S

he wasn't a saint, but she was one awesome mom.

I have made it my life mission to love myself.
To do things that benefit me.
To go and explore the world.
To get out of my own little bubble.

And I've done a little of it, but I have my whole life ahead of me.
The possibilities are endless as long as I believe in myself.

And if my mom taught me anything, is that you don't give up.
You don't give in.
There will always be a way out.

Thank you for sticking with me. I appreciate it.


Thursday, December 15, 2016

life after 18 - life lessons

The things you learn when you're young leave an impact on you.
The friends that you make in high school will always have a spacial place in your heart.
Your siblings will be more like friends once you're out of those slightly awkward teenage years and there's not much to tease you about but your life as a whole.
But that's the comforting part.

My siblings are still here, we're still a family even if we're all broken up.
Even if you don't agree with each other's decisions, you're still in their life because you love each other.


Wednesday, December 14, 2016

life after 18 - true to yourself

I sometimes think that I didn't get the "normal" teenage experience.

That I didn't go out in my early 20's.
That I haven't done enough to be considered an "experienced adult".
But then I think to myself, "did you really want to do all those things?"

And the answer is no. I am not a partier. I am not a smoker, nor a drinker.
I am simple and kinda boring.
I'm me and I am unapologetic about it.


Tuesday, December 13, 2016

life after 18 - directions

Now that I think back on the past 8 years, they've been all such a whirl whirl.
There are some things I can't really remember, time just isn't good with memories, I suppose. But as I sit here, reflecting on my life, I have to say that I am content. The pain of losing my mom at such a crucial point in my life, not to mention my sister's life was very hard on us.

But it's made us the people we are today.
The decisions we made then have led us to our now.
And I am still trying to find myself.
See where I belong.


Monday, December 12, 2016

life after 18 - changing positions

In my mid 20s now, people always ask me why I don't get married. If I don't want kids of my own.
The truth is that my "motherly" instincts were kicked into drive since I was 18. I worried, I cared for and I put others ahead of my needs.

I was looked at as a team player, when in reality, I was the coach.
And I am ready to take charge of my own happiness.


Sunday, December 11, 2016

life after 18 - black and white

Things were difficult. I felt so many emotions; abandoned, alone, unwanted and like I didn't want to do anything at all.
I was depressed and a HS senior.

But not everything was black and white.
There were smiles in between.
There were encouraging teachers, there were amazing best friend and then there was my little sister. And then came my nephew.

My life of a black and white movie was slowly regaining color.


Saturday, December 10, 2016

life after 18 - life is a movie

8 years and 2 days ago my life changed.
I felt like a fish without water.
Like the movie credits were rolling but I had barely even blinked and missed the whole thing.
8 years ago my mom passed away and I must say, it killed me. I died a little that day. From that day on, even though I was on autopilot, I changed.


Friday, December 9, 2016

life after 18 - like the waves

I wasn't really sure if I wanted to post this. It's very personal and kind of emotionally cathartic. These are snippets of my life. Eight little snippets leading up to the present. This is the first one.

Isn't it crazy how life can change in an instant? One moment can define the rest of your life.
Kind of like the ocean waves, they all look similar, but to those who are deep in the waves, the feel the difference.


Saturday, November 26, 2016

#instantdorkoriginal : raider shoot pt 2

  A little more than year ago, my sister asked me for a small intimate photo shoot with her Raider jersey. We had it, it was a success and this year, once she bought some items to add to her Oakland Raider collection she asked for a part 2. I gladly accepted. I wanted to try my lights on an actual person instead of my clothes mannequin for my little online shop. This is part of the outcome.

  My sister is a proud Oakland Raider fan. We're from Oakland, so it was kind of a no brainner. We love the colors and Silver and Black just go so well on us. I noticed that I don't have any photos from the first shoot here, so be on the look out. And check out my instagram for more pictures from this shoot.


instagram : @instantdork2.0

Thursday, November 24, 2016

Thankful for the Future

Thankful for The Future

I'm going to be random and say I am thankful for future adventures.

I'm going to be hopeful and I am going to say I'm thankful for new friendships and maybe something more.

I'm going to be optimistic and I'm going to say I'm thankful for a fruitful business.

I'm going to be grateful and say I'm thankful for my family both by blood and those that have become family by entering my heart.

-- Susy

Wednesday, November 23, 2016

#instantdorkoriginal : @karlajocellyn

One of the cool people I've meet from behind the screen, or rather, their phone has been Karla. She's an aspiring fashion blogger and she has the style to boot! I had the pleasure with my friend Brian to take a few photographs of her. Check her out and give her a follow. 


Monday, November 21, 2016

the benefit of having photographer friends

  There are tons of reasons why I love having friends that are photographers. I'll list a few of them.

  1. You go on adventures. They're spontaneous and will most likely will always be up to go outdoors and abandoned places. Not to mention lighthouses, fields of nothingness and long hours of talking. 
  2. You get grade A photos. I have tons of photos that have been captured from different photographers simply because I has in that area and because my friends were amazing enough to take photos of me. 
  3. You get to meet cool people. Bloggers, other photographers, and aspiring photographers too! Meeting the person behind the screen is a super amazing experience, totally worth the time if you can make time and meet someone new and chat. 
  4. Memories that last forever. Adventures are crossed off my life to-do list and even more are added.
Those are just some of the benefits you get. Not to mention being friends with such creative people. I also want to give a shout out to my friend Brian ( link to his work will be at the bottom ). He's been my friend for a little over two years and his camera has always been good to me. Have a great Monday guys!


Brian's instagram : @lastessacosa
Website :

Saturday, November 19, 2016

updated : about me

  I honestly didn't update anything up I just added pictures. Check it out anyway. Link.


Friday, November 18, 2016

adventure in point reyes

The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. 
- Christopher McCandless
  My friend came over for the last weekend to do a family photo shoot and we went out exploring. I live 15 min away from San Francisco, so we decided to go to Point Reyes and see the beauty of Karl (the fog) in all it's splendor. And we did. We were enveloped and we had such an amazing view. Adventures don't require you do go miles away from home or to another state. You can have them close by and keep them in your heart. 


Thursday, November 17, 2016

#ootd : neutral colors

cardigan : F21 / dress : old navy / boots : sam edelman

I love neutral colors. I really do. When I was in my early teen years I wore a lot of nudes and browns, now? Not so much. I tend to stick to darker colors like blue, black, grey, white and tan. The boots here were actually a lucky find I got in +Nordstrom Rack. They're +Sam Edelman tan leather boots that I just haven't worn a lot of but hopefully I get to wear more this fall. Oh, and if you haven't ever had +Blue Bottle Coffee , I recommend the New Orleans iced coffee. It's delicious. 


Wednesday, November 16, 2016

miu miu : red hot heels

buy them here
  These miu miu heels are ready to be brought to a new home. Clink on the link to check them out.


Tuesday, November 15, 2016

a little bit of life

  It feels like life has been a blur. There are some weekends that are full of adventure and some others that seem to drag on by. But, I just want to say, embrace yourself even if no one else does.


Sunday, October 9, 2016

Sunday : grey + blue

Sunday : grey + blue

Sunday : grey + blue by instantdork featuring cat home decor

I'm looking into expanding and learning more about selling, marketing and keeping myself motivated. I'll be out with a new blog post this week as well. Stay tuned!


Wednesday, September 21, 2016

end of summer sale

end of summer sale

end of summer sale by instantdork on Polyvore

I'm having a sale over in my #poshmark closet. I'm accepting offers and I'm open to negotiations. 

Everything has got to go, so don't hesitate and #treatyoself! Bundle deals are 25% off 2 or more items. 

Don't have an account? No problem, download the app and sign up with this code : HLSXL and get $5 credit.


Saturday, September 17, 2016

how the time flies...

My niece had her 15th birthday celebration a week ago. It was quite fun. My family was there, and we ate tacos until we couldn't any more. At the end we had sparklers and the kids were in heaven!


Friday, September 16, 2016

look out for better days ahead

This picture was taken at an instameet, which, if you haven't ever gone to one, I'd say do it. There's a cluster of photographers, models and just plain fun. I met Courtney at an instameet last year, and we've been in contact ever since. You guys should check out her instagram! I'll link it here.


Sunday, September 4, 2016

Early birthday giveaway

Early birthday giveaway

Early birthday giveaway by instantdork on Polyvore

Celebrate with me! Go to : @instantdork_theshop to see how you can win this phone case! There will be two winners tomorrow, so go and check it out!



Truly, I ain't got No Business here

Truly, I ain't got No Business here by instantdork featuring a shopping bag

My birthday is in two days and sadly I'm not going to do anything. But I will treat myself to walks in San Francisco and force my lazy self to explore Oakland. Sometimes, you need to push yourself to do more. I'm trying to change my habits, so that's what my "resolution" will be. Many people do their resolutions in New Years Eve, for me, it's more neas my birthday. 

Do any of you have a date you do resolutions beside NYE?


Tuesday, August 30, 2016

cross posting : where to find me

Hello everyone! I hope you're having a wonderful day, I just wanted to let everyone in on my cross-posting.
I use multiple platforms, so here are referral links, which you can get credits with, and my username, so you can find me.
@poshmark : username : instantdorkshop

Referral code HLSXL ($10 credit)

@Vinted : username instantdork_shop
No referral code.

@mercari : username instantdork
Referral code : BDYZCU ($2 credit)

@instagram : username instantdork_theshop


And don't forget to check out my personal insta : @instantdork2.0


Monday, August 29, 2016

from Seattle to LA

top picture : +Chihuly Garden and Glass museum Seattle, WA / bottom picture : Venice, CA

  I went to Seattle and Venice this summer and I had a blast. Give my instagram a follow to see more of my shots. Link in the bottom or in my side bar; just click the instagram logo.


Thursday, March 24, 2016


  So I signed up for the influenster program and I got picked to do a review for this product. Honestly, I was kind of skeptic, but I had a chance to actually use it on a hot day when I (attempted to) hike. The smell isn't too strong for me, and I really do like the simplistic and minimalistic face of the spray. I loved the spray, but one thing that I learned is that it's best worn for light days when you aren't going to sweat a lot. Although I did smell good regardless, the smell stays for much longer than my usual deodorant.
All in all, I give this a thumbs up. I'll use this for on the go and light days where I'm not doing any heavy lifting or hiking.


Monday, March 21, 2016

#ootd : feeling summer-ish

knit cardigan; LOFT / top, skirt and tote; Forever21 / shoes; Converse / sunglasses; Rayban

  Well, these month seem to just slip on by! I feel like it was just the first week of March, but it's already Spring! The weather has been very agreeable, It rains, it pours and then the sun comes out. I like it. So, to go with this crazy weather, I wore my basic F21 skirt and my LOFT colorful cardigan to take the slight chill away. It worked. And I must say the cardigan is super soft, but not really my style, so it's in my Poshmark closet. Don't have a Poshmark? Get my referral code here: HLSXL


Saturday, March 12, 2016

in my closet : Vince

  Get these amazing Vince sneakers over at my Poshmark closet. Use code HLSXL to get $10 credit.


Tuesday, March 8, 2016

meeting new people

  Life has been a bundle of unexpected moves. But I'm dealing with them. One thing I've just come to realize, is that while I'm friendly and a bundle of joy, I tend to keep to myself. So I decided to hang out with more people who like to do what I do. Get out and explore more. Here are a few tips so that it doesn't seem too daunting.

1.  Get Comfortable. You don't have to talk to them face to face if you don't want to. Go on social media, click on a geotag near you ( or a hashtag, mine would be #Oakland or #EploreOak ) and comment on person you think you might have similar interest as you.

2.  Set a date.  After you've talked for a few weeks, days, how much ever you feel comfortable, meet in a social place. I usually meet for coffee first them we get to doing whatever we want. Usually it involves #OOTD pics, landscape photos or portraits.

3.  Let the magic happen.  Even if you haven't met someone in person, you might feel a connection to them. That's the beauty of social media. I've meet two great people on social media and that number will soon go to three. Be you, you've already had endless conversations about that certain photographer you admire or that place you just dream of visiting.

  It's a simple 1-2-3 step. If the conversation flows, then you now have a new friend who lkes to do things you do. I hope my awkwardly given advice helps.


Monday, February 29, 2016


photo credit : pictures 2/3 american photographic

Yesterday my friend Cindy and new friend Namu attended an instameet in Sutro Lookout Point. It was pretty awesome. More than 200 people came out. And to match faces to instagram names is just so cool. This is my third instagram meet and I can't wait until the next one. It's so nice to see and interact with people who love doing what you like to do, too.


Tuesday, February 23, 2016

#ootd : Monday Blues

bag + shirt : Old Navy / jeans: Levi's (the rack) / shoes : Converse (nordstrom)

The weekend is gone and I'm feeling blue. My Friday night and Saturday were packed with "family time" and I enjoyed it immensely. But, everything comes to an end. But, the good news is I was looking quite awesome with my brand new +Converse. I just love them! They go well with dresses, skirts, jeans and they're just so... casual! I love them!  I absolutely love this top from +Old Navy as well. I love the light linen feeling it has. I can't wait to wear this in Seattle!

Ta-ta for now.


Tuesday, February 16, 2016

#ootd : Sweet Valentine

cardigan + tote : F21 / dress : gap (thredUP) / boots : Sam Edelman (the rack)

  This Valentine's Day I spent it with my buddy Ava taking some pretty awesome #outfit pictures! I went sweet while she went edgy (stay tuned, hers will be up soon!). I bought these boots almost two years a go for a steam and the dress has become my favorite little frock. And best of all, I got it for only $15!
  +2eyes4style and I had a great time laughing and doing some funny poses. Kind of like my face in the second picture. Romeo? What Romeo?


Wednesday, February 10, 2016

find yourself

This year is already at it's second month. This year feels like it's just going to be like sand between your hands and slip by. I'm excited for lots of things. Seattle in June, my progress in my photography class. I hope to expand my horizons in life. But living alone has given me a new take on myself and my independance and a new outlook on what I want in life. I guess you've got to find yourself in between all those not so pleasant times in life.

Always remember, "A calm sea never made a skilled sailor."

Just keep swimming, buddy!


Friday, January 8, 2016

Last of December pt.2

As of late, I have noticed many things change. My life has... changed. For better or for worse, well, I guess I have to own it, don't I? Any way, as I mentioned before, Ava and I met up and we took outfit pictures. I always have a good time with Ava. I hope this year we have many more collaboration.


Thursday, January 7, 2016

Last of December


  Ava from 2eyes4style and I met up a few days before the year ended and we did what we do best. We posed, we chatted and we were thankful for just everything. I love her style, seriously. If you haven't checked her out, please do!

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